HelpLine: "General Motors HelpLine, how can I help you?" 
  
Customer: "I got in my car and closed the door and nothing happened!" 
  
HelpLine: "Did you put the key in the ignition slot and turn it?" 
  
Customer: "What's an ignition?" 
  
HelpLine: "It's a starter motor that draws current from your battery and turns over the engine." 
  
Customer: "Ignition?  Motor? Battery?  Engine?  How come I have to know all these technical terms just to use my car?"
  
    
HelpLine: "General Motors HelpLine, how can I help you?" 
  
Customer: "My car ran fine for a week and now it won't go anywhere!" 
  
HelpLine: "Is the gas tank empty?"
  
Customer: "Huh?  How do I know?" 
  
HelpLine: "There's a little gauge on the front panel with a needle and markings from 'E' to 'F'.  Where is the needle pointing?" 
             
Customer: "It's pointing to 'E'.  What does that mean?" 
  
HelpLine: "It means you have to visit a gasoline vendor and purchase some more gasoline.  You can install it yourself or pay the vendor to install it for you." 
  
Customer: "What?  I paid $12,000 for this car!  Now you tell me that I have to keep buying more components?  I want a car that comes with everything built in!"
  
    
HelpLine: "General Motors HelpLine, how can I help you?" 
  
Customer: "Your cars suck!" 
  
HelpLine: "What's wrong?" 
  
Customer: "It crashed, that's what wrong!" 
  
HelpLine: "What were you doing?" 
  
Customer: "I wanted to run faster, so I pushed the accelerator pedal all the way to the floor.  It worked for a while and then it crashed and it won't start now! 
         
HelpLine: "It's your responsibility if you misuse the product.  What do you expect us to do about it?" 
  
Customer: "I want you to send me one of the latest version that doesn't crash any more!"
  
    
HelpLine: "General Motors HelpLine, how can I help you?" 
  
Customer: "Hi, I just bought my first car, and I chose your car because it has automatic transmission, cruise control, power steering, power brakes, and power door locks." 
             
HelpLine: "Thanks for buying our car.  How can I help you?" 
  
Customer: "How do I work it?"
  
HelpLine: "Do you know how to drive?" 
  
Customer: "Do I know how to what?" 
  
HelpLine: "Do you know how to drive?" 
  
Customer: "I'm not a technical person.  I  just want to go places in my car!"
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